An Exerciser’s Guide to Profanity

If you’re reading this Mom I fucking apologize in advance.  Even the most prim and proper of gym goers and fitness enthusiasts know there are some times when dropping the F bomb or the B word during a workout just seems like the right thing to do.  I’ve taken the liberty to compile a list of times during a workout when you just have to let the fucks fly.

  1. When you hit that PR– Few things are more satisfying than squatting that extra 10 pounds or shaving 3 minutes off your 5K PR.  An occasion like this deserves at least 1 celebratory profanity, after all you did that shit!
  2. The dreaded sports injury– Maybe you went over the bars on your bike or you stepped off that curb a little too close and sprained your ankle.  Even if the injury isn’t severe enough to warrant a trip to the doc or the ER you are fully entitled to scream and curse out the inanimate object that caused your bloody downfall.
  3. When you lose– To be frankly honest, nobody like a sore loser.  That being said, it’s entirely OK to have a moment of anger and self pity due to a tough loss. After all who is that asshole to beat you anyway?  Just don’t sulk, and always have a plan to move on quickly from your disappointment.
  4. When you win–  It’s about fucking time you did it! You’re the champion and it’s your time to celebrate. Pour yourself a glass of champagne and enjoy the damn thing.

 

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